Nine on the 9th: How We Are Different

This is a list of nine glorious ways that Kristl and Rachel embody the phrase "opposites attract" and how that works and doesn't work for them on a daily basis. 1. Math/No Math: Kristl loved math all through school.  She loved math so hard that she decided to major in math in college.  She only stopped loving math when it stopped being math and became theoretical (i.e. not really "math"). That's when she left college to go be an acupuncturist.  Kristl is really good at computation, mental math, being a calculator, figuring out how many of that will fit into that, etc. On one of their first dates, Kristl challenged Rachel to make her do large number multiplication in her head. It was amusing, but Rachel never knew if she was right or not. Rachel, on the other hand, is Team No Math. She will do her best to avoid mental math if she can eyeball or intuit how much she will need of something. She was a straight A student all through grade school with the exception of 4th grade math, in which she received C's because she could not slam multiplication tables into her brain fast enough. She managed to adapt to higher level math (algebra, calculus, etc), because it WAS more theoretical, but the calculations were almost always the reason she lost points on quizzes and tests. Thankfully, Rachel passed her AP Calculus exam with a 3 and did not have to take ANY MORE MATH EVER in college. The only bad thing (so far) about being a farmer, is all the math Rachel has to do to figure out how many plants will fit in a plot. Agony.

Studying

2. Sports: Rachel was never really good at sports, but she really loved playing them growing up, especially basketball. (Having been raised a conservative Christian, she had a shirt that said "Christ is Life, Everything else is Basketball." Don't judge.) In high school, she played basketball, and ran cross-country and track. She was pretty buff. Kristl, on the other hand, did not play sports. At all. She was very involved in choir, drama, and student government, but didn't play a single sport in high school. The funny thing is, Kristl's not actually bad at sports, she just never had the desire to play on a team. When Rachel tries to apply sports team analogies to real life situations, Kristl frequently can't relate. Neither of us really enjoys watching sports that much, unless it's our friends playing in a league or it's an Olympic year.

3. Looks: We look completely different. Completely. We were thinking about the old adage that partnered couples start to look alike as they get older and we tried to figure out where we were similar - where someone would be like, "Oh, it's your ears, definitely. Your ears are the same." Yeah, no.  Kristl is short, she's got big boobs, she's half-Chinese, she has short legs, brown eyes, dark brown hair. Rachel is half a foot taller, has basically no boobs, she's got some hips, long legs, blue-green eyes, light brown hair, she's mostly German-American with some Anglo-Saxon muttness thrown in. Our faces have different shapes; our ears don't even connect to our heads the same way. We do both have size 8.5 feet, but our feet are shaped very differently. We've concluded that as we age, we will only look the same in spirit.  If you start to think we do look alike, it's merely an illusion.

See? We don't look at all alike!

4. Introvert and Extrovert: This one is sort of a cop out, but it frequently plays a big role in our lives. Kristl is definitely more introverted, so she needs a lot of alone time to get her energy back when she's had to be around people. Rachel is more extroverted, so she is able to get energy by being around people. Sometimes this comes in handy when Kristl has to go to a party for something semi-professional, but she doesn't really want to talk to people. She can bring Rachel, and Rachel can talk to people and enjoy herself while Kristl can still make an appearance for the sake of her business.

5. Cats and Dogs: Rachel grew up super afraid of dogs, because she was attacked by one when she was three, and Kristl grew up super allergic to cats (thankfully, she's adjusted to Delilah). Rachel grew up with at least one pet cat in the house at all times, and Kristl has always loved dogs, but her mother refused to let them have labor-intensive pets growing up, so they had things like fish and a Japanese quail. Kristl wanted to get a dog as soon as she had her own place that allowed them (which she did). So, obviously, the fact that Kristl and Rachel now have a cat and a dog together is a pretty big accomplishment. Bradley and Delilah have been very patient through the whole process. Little known fact: Rachel told Bradley that she loved him the first time she met him, on her first date with Kristl. It took her almost four months from that day to say the same thing to Kristl.

Rachel loves Bradley.

6. DANCING: Kristl loves dancing. She loves swing, lindy hop, and tap, and tends to thrive in dance styles that allow freedom within structure. She's planning on taking up tap again, just because she loves it so much. Rachel is quite a different matter and loves to dance in as free a style possible. She loves to just groove to the music and isn't good at super structured moves because she doesn't exactly see the point of it. If you can impress people without structured moves, then just move your body. Part of this difference of opinion about dancing style and structure is why Kristl and Rachel haven't tried any partner dance classes yet. They have their eye on the queer tango class, but they have yet to commit.

7. Sleeping style: This is a little bit difficult to describe, but Kristl and Rachel have very different approaches to blanket usage while they are sleeping. This bothers Kristl a great deal and bothers Rachel very little, until she completely loses a blanket or a pillow and finds herself super cold and sad in the middle of the night. They don't even share blankets for the most part because each person in the bed is the master of her own blanket destiny. Kristl usually makes it through the whole night with her blankets in place, while Rachel is lucky to make it to midnight without dropping a pillow or curling into the fetal position because she's cold and she's lost her blanket. Kristl frequently will ask Rachel if she wants her pillow or blanket because she looks uncomfortable, but Rachel doesn't answer these interrogatives...because she is sleeping. (Kristl usually gives Rachel the pillow or blanket back anyway and then Rachel smiles and it's super adorable.) The best is when Rachel loses her own blanket and then tries to steal Kristl's. Kristl loves that.

8. Cooking style: Rachel makes big messes when she cooks and it stresses Kristl out to be in the kitchen with her working on the same project. They can peacefully coexist in the kitchen, IF Kristl doesn't pay too close attention to what Rachel is doing. Rachel does always clean up after her giant messes, and then cleans up after the tiny messes that Kristl leaves when she gets too stressed out by cooking in the same kitchen as Rachel and has to leave. We both try to clean as we go, but it doesn't always work out as planned.

Canning tomatoes is definitely one of our messier kitchen endeavors. Last year there may have been a lot of Kristl yelling at Rachel for being messy. Hopefully things will be different this year.

9. Good morning/good night world:  Rachel falls asleep pretty easily, especially since having to wake up at 4:45 for farm work, but it takes her a good hour to be a fully-functioning human in the morning. Kristl takes a while to power down in the evening, but she wakes up almost immediately in the morning, or pretty much whenever she's woken up. Sometimes, especially in the spring, Kristl will wake up all on her own around 6:00 am for weeks at a time, just like the sun. This bothers Rachel to no end, as Kristl will wake up and start chatting immediately. For the first year of their relationship Kristl had to learn not to talk to "Morning Rachie" until she was given the okay.

Nine on the 9th

1. Rachel went to college in Michigan and considers it her second home. She went to Calvin  College in Grand Rapids, and usually visits 2-3 times a year.  The nature preserve at Calvin is where she would get away from busy college life, and it is also where she proposed to Kristl this past August. At the nature preserve at Calvin College, just after getting engaged

2. Kristl did two years at Boston College before quitting to attend acupuncture school. She loves Boston, but hasn't been back since 2002. Hopefully one day she'll be able to take Rachel there for a visit.

3. Rachel has a minor obsession with Stephen King and has gotten Kristl into his stuff as well. Kristl went from having read no Stephen King to having read 14 of his books in the past couple years (including the entire Dark Tower series). She's currently working on The Shining. (Rachel has read 26 of his books, but she hasn't read The Stand, which Kristl has read.)

4. Rachel used to play the oboe (and it's slightly larger and deeper-voiced cousin, the English horn) in high school, and there is a wonderful home video of her flipping her hair a lot before, during, and after a recital.

5. Kristl went to Space Camp in the 5th grade. She served as the pilot of her space mission and was the only girl in her group not placed in Mission Control. There is a home video compilation featuring her awkwardness in all its glory.

Can you handle the Space Camp awesomeness?

6. Somehow we have a knack at getting free food. At least once or twice a month we'll get a dish comped at a restaurant for no reason or our order will be minorly messed up and they'll fix it by bringing us a bunch of extra food. Once we were at a restaurant in Grand Rapids and they comped over half our tab (including Rachel's beer flight!) for no other reason than we "looked like nice people."

7. Rachel ran cross country in high school, but she was almost always the last person to finish. Once she got so lost at a meet that someone had to come find her because she didn't know where the course was. She still runs for exercise, but rarely competes (or gets lost) anymore.

8. Kristl took the ubiquitous ballet/jazz/tap classes as a kid, but really excelled at tap. One day, she found out that Fred Astaire shared a birthday with her and she told her mom that she was pretty sure she had his spirit and that's why she was such a good tapper. (She's not actually anywhere near as good as Fred, though.)

9. We've lived in our apartment for a year and a half and still have a handful of boxes we haven't unpacked and a bunch of pictures and artwork that we haven't hung on the walls. Despite all of this, our home feels rather warm and inviting. (On a related note: Anybody have any hookups for frames? We've purchased a few art pieces that are odd sizes and we don't have the money to get custom frames for them right now.)

We hope to be back to somewhat regular posts in the next few weeks. Things are in a major state of flux right now, but once everything settles, we should have much more time for blogging. You can keep up with us on Facebook until then!